We have reached the stage where Little Zs social calendar is a lot better than ours. To be fair ours has been pretty non existent for the last few years bar nights out where we behave like naughty panicked teens rushing back at lightning speed in order not break the babysitting curfew.
Little Z on the other hand is now enjoying extra curricular activities outside of nursery that mainly consists of football, the park, feeding the ducks that really shouldn’t be fed and what seems like a never ending stream of birthday parties. The Other Half and I are contemplating buying shares at Argos considering the amount we’re panic buying from there.
This weekend we were a bit more organised and off we trundled to the next party. This time Little Z was slightly amazed at the sight that beheld him. A big, bright, extremely colourful and very inflated bouncy castle.
He stared for a bit and watched some of the more experienced children clamber on and bounce away. The first 10 times I asked if he wanted a go I got a resounding “NO!” and he instead opted to hover about 3 cm away from me eyeing up the huge, slightly shaky looking, castle with suspicion. He briefly braved it for about 30 seconds when I offered to go on with him but quickly decided he hated the sensation and planted himself back into terra firma and refused point blank after that.
With the noise of 20+ 3 year olds resonating around the house it felt like this was going to be one looooong party. The temptation to tuck into the birthday cake at lightning speed was pretty strong!
Lucky for me it wasn’t long before Happy Birthday was sung and the cake was cut. Little Z turned to me as soon as the candles were blown and requested “My turn now?”. Thankfully he didn’t protest too loudly when I said not today.
As I got distracted by the very nice fresh cream cake and party nibbles I glanced out into the garden and saw Little Z bouncing away happily on the castle with the rest of the children. Not only that but he was attempting to run straight into the sides of the walls to ricochet straight of them. Uh oh.
He looked delighted with his new found plaything and stayed it despite some of the more boisterous children bouncing about with a lot more vigour. Even once defending himself and his balloon from some eager little fingers. I was secretly pleased I may not have to enrol him into karate after all and he may be ok in the school playground after all.
An hour and some drizzle later, Little Z was still going strong and I pondered the possibility of him wanting to spend the night on it after failing a few times to somehow coax him of it.
With the weather getting worse someone eventually had the brilliant idea of letting the air out and, like the final scene in the Snowman movie, Little Z gazed at his now deflated toy looking a bit gutted.
His disappointment didn’t last too long though as he fell asleep 5 minutes after we got home and treated us all to a lie in the day after.
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I’m pretty terrible at going to the dentist. I avoid it like the plague and will only go if I am reduced to crawling there in a lot of pain. Little Z on the other hand doesn’t really have many memories on having his teeth checked and on our last visit pretty much sat in my lap and refused to open his mouth for the stranger pointing shiny looking objects at his mouth.
Last month expedited our trip to them, mainly on account of my entire face throbbing on one side due to toothache. God it hurt. Realising I haven’t seen a dentist for about 6 years, I made the dreaded phone calls scouring for one that would help me out in an emergency and trying not to succumb to screaming “please just rip it out” down the phone at the secretary. We finally tootled off to one that took sympathy on me; one excited little boy and one very much in pain mum.
It was as if Little Z had entered the room of total wonderment when he stepped into the dentists
torture chamber office. Gadgets, bright lights, and a big massive chair that magically moved up and down of its own accord. Slightly disappointed he couldn’t touch anything he looked on as I climbed into the not so wonderous chair and relayed my tale of woe to the dentist fully expecting a painful numbing injection and numerous fillings.
It didn’t take long before he decided to assist the dentist count and label my teeth and helpfully shouted out random numbers as the dentist instructed the dental assistant. I couldn’t see the dentists reaction but could hear the dental assistant giggling and prayed I didn’t choke on his little mirror thing as I laughed with my mouth wide open. Thankfully I got away with just antibiotics and Little Z walked away with a spiderman sticker even though I was the brave patient. Of course he completely clamped his mouth shut as soon as the dentist jokingly offered to check his mouth.
He has since been spending all his days telling people they must brush their teeth or they will fall out. In random cases he will spontaneously prise my mouth open to demonstrate to his audience exactly where one should brush. I try to be patient as he finishes his presentation. My brother takes full advantage of this and keeps asking for an encore. I do wonder what it’ll be like when its his turn to be in the chair next month.
At least one of us likes the dentist…for now.
Its my turn this week to host Loud n Proud. If you have any proud little (or big!) moments you’d like to share then feel free to grab the badge and link up below. Old, new, quirky, bold…all welcome! The linky goes live on Thursday morning and will stay open till Sunday night.
So after careful observation of just the one 3 year old (mine), here is what I think the rules are:
1. Accept no help whatsoever in any task. Shout defiantly that you are going to do it by yourself.
2. After struggling for about 15 minutes, demand Adult helps you instantly.
3. Take 2 hours to only half eat breakfast.
4. Wait till Adult gives in persuading you to eat, watch them eat your breakfast. Then have emotional tantrum about how you actually wanted it.
5. Demand Adult gives you something different. Don’t eat it once presented with it.
6. Get a new batch of emotions every week. Use them dramatically every hour or so. Instant waterworks are good to acquire things quickly.
7. Insist on helping in EVERYTHING. Take charge and tell Adult what to do.
8. Instantly repeat things you really shouldn’t. Naughty words or frustrated adult huffs are usually good.
9. Repeat excitedly at great speed if Adult looks horrified and tries to get you to stop.
10. Talk Non-stop. All day. Every day. Non stop. Without pause.
11. Rise same time every day around the break of dawn. Or before. Whether you went to bed late or not.
12. Make Adult drag you out of bed on weekdays. Get up before break of dawn at weekends.
13. Start telling the public and relatives what goes on at home. Regale stories of what Mummy and Daddy did and spill the beans on anything that’s private. Making stuff up is ok and spices things up. Watch Adults squirm later when public/ relatives enquire if said story is true.
14. Refuse need for loo the first 20 times an Adult asks.
15. Announce you need loo as soon as Adult is about to put morsel of food in mouth. Make it look urgent.
16. Do a 2 second wee and announce you’re done. Yes you’re sure. Look exasperated with Adults constant questioning around if you’re done.
17. Take ages to get into car seat. Eventually do it after Adult threatens to take something away. Decide you need the loo..
18. Refuse to leave car unless Adult lets you “drive”. Sit in drivers seat and pretend to drive. Take your time and get full enjoyment out of driving experience.
19. Tell Adult they are your best friend. Throws them off track.
21. Say “please!” constantly and repeatedly to try to get more sweets/drinks/crisps/naughty snack out of them.
22. As soon as any Adult says they are going out, ask where they are off to and announce you are going too, whether you’ve been invited or not.
So this is, apparently, how to play football, aged 3.
1. Take great delight in playing “fox” and “rabbits”, a drill session where they chase a designated “rabbit”).
2. Run directly to Daddy when it’s your turn to play the rabbit as you get chased by a roaring fox.
3. Attempt to shove bib down shorts when coach instructs it should be worn (as required in the drill sessions).
4. Concentrate on coach’s instructions for about 3 seconds before getting up and sprinting in some random direction.
5. Spend half of the training session scooped up under the coach’s armpit as he brings you back to the pitch.
6. Love kicking the football every which way, even when instructed to stop.
7. Take a break mid game and jump over the line of cones. Just for fun.
8. Practice how to dive. A lot! Sometimes just drop spontaneously even if there’s been no other human contact. Laugh hilariously.
9. Ask to drink a Fruit shoot every 5 minutes.
10. Shout “You can’t catch me!” and leg it as soon as it’s time to vacate the sports hall.
A few days ago, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting and the weather looked absolutely lovely. So we decided to take advantage of the weather, not go to pre-school and have a little day out and drive to the zoo. Little Z was excited about seeing all the animals and had his heart set on seeing crocodiles and Oleg from the Meerkats advert and I wanted to have a play with my camera.
Its been about a year since we visited a zoo or safari park and it was amusing to watch Little Z react to all the animals and get both excited and a bit blasse about the different things there.
Some of our highlights (as experienced by a Little Z)…
Elephants are really really impressive, to the point where you should repeatedly call them. Then look a bit annoyed when they don’t respond. Then try again.
The ride on elephant toy is probably more impressive than all the real life elephants put together.
Meerkats are very confusing when they are in the wild, look nothing like Oleg from the Compare the Market adverts and don’t have any clothes on. Commenting “Why is it so small?” Looking unimpressed that Oleg is nowhere to be seen.
Staring at the giraffe licking his face for a while and as it approaches look a bit worried and eventually shouting “Its going to eat me!”
Looking elated when asked if we should visit the “Dinosaur Safari”. Knowing how much Little Z likes dinosaurs I knew he’d like it. Its a little old area of the zoo filled with massive dinosaurs of all varieties that don’t move but do make the dinosaur roars from hidden speakers in the bushes. One of my biggest pet peeves is that every time you ask Little Z what he wants to eat he will, in the words of little brother George (from Peppa Pig) exclaim “Dinosaur!” and then do the “GRRRR!” for completion. It drives me completely round the bend but its something he loves saying. We wandered around the Dinosaur Safari world and Little Z looked a bit nervous each time one of the big dinosaurs roared, holding my hand at all times which is completely unheard of.
As we left I naughtily asked him: “So….do you want to eat a dinosaur?”
Little Z: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
And he’s not asked to eat one since.