I’ve recently noticed a few things that have made me believe I may be finally emerging from the baby fog. I mean, for one thing, I am starting to remember exactly what i was talking about 30 seconds previously. This is just amazing. A massive achievement for me. I was getting so sick of forgetting what I was talking about midway through a sentence that I was starting to give up finishing a conversation. I’m not sure my hubby actually noticed me say “oh, forget it!” countless times. But still. After the 10th time of forgetting what the hell you were talking about you kind of get a bit frustrated. As well as that, I think I *may* be finishing my time on the “emotional baby roller coaster of those first few months”. This bodes well for my husbands sanity and his bald patch. The poor guy has been at the receiving end of emotional outbursts for a few months now, as well as a lot of “I don’t know why I’m crying!”. I went through a phase of crying at everything. And I mean everything. Even hypothetical scenarios like “what will I do when my cousin gets married (to the guy she’s just started dating) and moves away and I won’t see her regularly!”. Or when I cried my eyes out when the vampire with the terrible British accent died after two episodes on Vampire Diaires. That was a bad one, from what I remember.
These little self discoveries clicked to me when I went round wedding dress shopping with my cousin last weekend. I watched her try on about 12 wedding dresses and I didn’t cry once! I’m hoping this proves my time on the emotional roller coaster is coming to an end. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think I am still a lot more emotional than I was before the baby. But I’m probably on the emotional tea cups now (I hope). A bit of nausea, a bit of boredom and a whole lot of spinning, but it makes a nice change from the extreme highs and lows of that emotional roller-coaster.
Mind you, a couple of strange things have happened recently. Last week I was trying to get to the cupboard under the stairs and went to step over the very visible laptop wire. Somehow, even with it in full view. I misjudged my footing, whilst looking at the wire, tripped over it and went flying solidly into the floorboards, banging my knee in the process.
Slightly worse still, and I’m still not sure how this happened, but, during our hunt for a wedding dress trip, I happened to be standing patiently outside the changing rooms waiting for my cousin to try on dress number 3. As I aimlessly glanced around the shop floor I noticed a woman who looked like she was focussed on finding something in particular. She looked familiar but I couldn’t put my finger on who she was. In her focussed hunting she wandered over to where I was standing, only noticing all the products on the shelves. Then I gasped with a sudden realisation, grabbed BOTH (yes, both) her hands and bellowed an emphatic “Hello!!!”. She was clearly terrified at being grabbed and in that same split second, jumped out of her skin and tried to save herself. She then realised who I was, raised her hand instantly to her chest, and relaxed. Slightly. She was my cousins Mother-In-Law-to-be. We’ve only ever met once before and the very excitable greeting was not one she looked that comfortable with. She was very pleasant for someone whose blood pressure had probably gone through the roof and as we were talking I felt more and more mortified at what I’d just done. She made her escape quite quickly and (thankfully) finished with “see you at the wedding”. Phew.
This better not be a new phase.