Goodbye Jeans

Goodbye Jeans

We have reached an interesting phase in our house. Little Z has decided he fancies himself a bit of a Patrick Swayze in the last scene of Dirty Dancing; the bit where he slides across the floor on his knees. Except that he does it constantly. About 4 times an hour.

Whether it’s leaping off his latest thrill seeking height, running about at speed or simply showing off his new found footy skills, everything lands with sliding across the floor and more often than not, his artistic moves are finished by just lying there, for a bit of a rest, and occasionally with his ear to the ground. Literally.

And instead of just getting up, a new found perspective has been experienced. That of walking around on all fours. Like “a cat”. This particular cat can move at pretty high speed, testing the mettle of his jeans, scuffing as they go, wearing thin way before their time.

It doesn’t matter where we are and outdoors in public places is just as effective a place to practice as in the comfort of his own home.

As I find myself immersed in a daily loop of scraping dried mud off both his trainers and his jeans, I’ve come to definite conclusion that jeans are not going to live their intended lifespan in our house for the next decade, at least. Unless, of course, I invest in some heavy duty shin pads or start sewing the equivalent of elbow patches onto his knees. Whilst they would be questionably uncool they may have a huge market out there. Imagine the demand. I could be rich.

To his delight, he discovered he could admire himself gliding around on his knees in a recent visit to a shoe shop. With the majority of mirrors placed at feet height he gazed at his reflection whilst skidding speedily about on his knees around not one, but 4 shops whilst the Other Half wanted to visit “just one more shop” to find the perfect pair of trainers and as my head was slowly about to blow clean off my shoulders from trying to keep Little Z in one place. Any attempt to do so simply encouraged him to act like a rag doll and flop to the ground, giggle and lie down.

After a game of impromptu game of hide and seek amongst the clothes rails we decided it was time to leave.

Thankfully we made it out with my head just about in tact and vowed never to visit the Trafford centre again on a Saturday with a 3 year old. Unless they start paying me for having squeaky clean floors.

33 thoughts on “Goodbye Jeans”

  1. Ahh – I’m going through the same thing. It’s happening most often in the supermarket – and why wouldn’t it with their super slidey floors?!


    (Elbow-knee patches are the way forward. They definitely need to exist.)
    Sian recently posted…Yummy in my tummy.My Profile

  2. Oh I have a boy who loves to drop to his knees and slide at every opportunity. He’s nearly 7 and still doing it! Thankfully he prefers tracksuit bottoms though. x
    Mhairi Little Hands recently posted…Soft Pretzel RingsMy Profile

  3. He’s such a dude isn’t he! I can just imagine Z sliding round on the floor, it’s probably really good fun though. POD went through a phase of doing that, she’s now moved onto jumping – the higher the better! Lovely post, thank you so much for sharing #whatsthestory
    Charly Dove recently posted…Photos from the beachMy Profile

  4. Brilliant! I love the image of Little Z sliding along πŸ™‚ Thankfully I seemed to escape this phase, and have only seen a couple of pairs of the boys trousers go through in the knee… The wee girl on the other hand… πŸ™‚
    Sara (@mumturnedmom) recently posted…Welcome Home DaddyMy Profile

  5. We have the same issue in shopping centres. Just loves being on his knees.

    Knee pads – you can get them for dancing, although probably not in child size! Someone at work was talking about patching his jeans (on the inside) when he wanted to wear them for longer. I can’t imagine wearing patched jeans as an adult.
    Emma T recently posted…300 Picture book challenge week 18My Profile

  6. I learnt very early on that doing pretty much any kind of shopping with a toddler is a deeply stressful experience for me and one I avoid if at all possible! Short trips are fine, but I daren’t linger for even a nanosecond. And my son loved bouncing on his knees for a good few months, fortunately he’s stopped it now thank goodness.
    Deep breaths πŸ™‚
    Iona@Redpeffer recently posted…Easy masking tape craftMy Profile

  7. Haha I have to say this image is pretty funny, although that’s probably because we aren’t there yet!! I guess I’ve just ruined any chance of sympathy when we do get there now though!!!! X
    Seychellesmama recently posted…Me timeMy Profile

  8. Oh dear, that’s a funny turn! Let’s hope he grows out of this phase soon. You have to get this caught on video before he stops (should be fairly easy if he does it 4 times an hour, hihi). Mel #ShareWithMe

  9. You should hire him out to weddings when they don’t have a child to perform such antics! There should ALWAYS be a little boy sliding on the dance floor on his knees at a wedding! πŸ™‚

  10. Wow you are ever so brave to go to the Mall with a toddler on a Saturday. Good on you. Challenge. hahaha Glad you made it out safely. Hhaah I love kids and the funny things they do as toddlers. So funny. Jeans I don’t think go with a toddler Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme
    Jenny recently posted…Share With Me ~ wk 14My Profile

  11. Trousers with holes in the knees are a must have fashion statement in our house at the moment. Why walk anywhere when you can do all this other stuff, right? I bet your son is great fun on the dance floor at a wedding πŸ™‚
    Debra recently posted…10 top links for an organised kitchenMy Profile

  12. hehehe what a funny post, maybe you should get some knee pads or, even better, knee pads with dusters attached so the floor can be cleaned too-winner πŸ˜‰

  13. Bless him, he sounds like a character! Children find a way of entertaining themselves and I’m sure you wouldn’t have him any other way. It’s funny how little girls don’t do things like that?! Maybe buy lots of cheap jeans! Love your comical writing style! #PoCoLo
    lorna mai recently posted…Smarten Check Shirts And Look Less Like A StudentMy Profile

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